The week in non-binary 1

It's been a fairly uninteresting week. I managed 5 gym sessions, obviously in my usual regalia of Tikiboo leggings. Last week I was miss-gendered (pun intended) twice in the space of as many minutes when I went to the shop after Saturday's Step session. Two separate men called me "love". I was miss-gendered again today when I went for a coffee at the new branch of Greggs that had -opened in my gym carpark, as a lady in the queue, when asked who was next indicated me saying "this lady". On both occasions I'd been sweaty and my hair was a mess and obviously with no makeup, but I suppose men don't wear colourful leggings, have red hair in a bob or are 5ft 4in tall.

I ain't no lady This is my gym outfit from last Sunday when I was misgendered in Greggs

One thing that has been on my mind is Christmas parties. I found out earlier this week that the gym I go to to attend Step is having a do. Now, since the realisation that I'm non-binary, I tend to go out socially with an andrognous presentation which has been inching further towards the pink side of the see-saw so I'd really want to present as feminine when I went out. I really want to wear a dress, do my makeup up and style my hair. This was causing me, if not anxiety, a lot of preoccupation. Firstly, my main gym buddy had said she wasn't going, and she is the only person I really know well. Secondly, the do is in my own town which is double edged. On the one hand, it means it was only a 10 minute walk, but on the other hand there was a chance of bumping into someone I know, especially if we headed out to other bars later on. I had gone to their party a couple of years ago when I was pushing the androgyny: skinny femme jeans, femme t-shirt and some light makeup, but this was in another town. I'd been mulling on this when all of a sudden there were signs going up at work telling me my works do was going to be the day before.

So, this was a whole different ballgame. I still want to present femme, but this is to people I work with and see every day. I'm very senior, so would I lose credibility, or maybe even gain credibility? Again, at last year's party I'd gone for androgynous (see below), with the same look as at the gym party the previous year, though my hair was longer, but wearing a dress is going over a line. That toothpaste won't go back inthe tube, but then again, toothpaste stuck in the tube isn't cleaning anyone's teeth.

My look at last year's Christmas party at work Definite androgynous vibes